Friday, March 18, 2011

Brand New Start,

[March 6th, 2011]

It’s 3am and I’m flying high like a bird. Everyone told me that drinking is a no-no when I have finals in less than a week’s time but no one said anything about weed coming from the lovely mother earth… So please, bear with my future typos and grammatical errors, I am not in the right state to be typing away.

In the last couple days that I’ve been home, I learned that I am on the brink of unveiling a brand new start to my life. Re-setting my emotional, spiritual and physical being for the sake of my future self revolution. I learned that letting go is the best thing to do, learning from past mistakes and learning from past accomplishments. Take the things I’ve learned in my past experiences and acknowledge the beauty of life by watching movies of my best memories and dreams of my future. I am not afraid of a lot of things but one thing I am most afraid of is the future. I wonder what the future has in store for me, career-wise, relationship-wise and on the whole, me.

I guess losing you of all people wasn’t part of what I planned for a couple years ago, but that happened and I learned from that. I learned a lot, and grew into a different person… Maybe not necessarily for the better but I grew. I used to miss you every damn day but now I don’t know if I still have the ability to care anymore. I hope you do well in life. All the best for you.

And as for you bestfriend, I love you and will always love you. Thank you for being there for me when I thought all was lost. Thank you for being there for me, giving me the warmest hugs and wiping away my tears when I needed a friend the most. I cannot thank you enough. What we have here, it’s special, it’s different, and it’s nothing like I’ve ever known or even heard of before. It’s so much easier to hate when you have reason to…. You never hurt me; I can’t bring myself to get over our memories because you never hurt me. Not even once. I keep telling myself it’s not the right time but then again, I might be telling myself the same thing for the next few years. But what the hell, you’re still here for me aren’t you? You’re there and you are always gonna have my back no matter what. Right now, aside from family, I trust you most. And you deserve to be trusted the way I trust you. I’m here for you. There are certain people in life that you know are meant to stay be it as lovers, friends or just good company and you are definitely one of those people. I love you, always.

The boy with one of the biggest hearts and one of the bestest of best friends I could ever ask for, please never leave my side the same way I’ll never leave yours. Aiman Danial, whatever it is that you need; I pray I am. I love you bestfriend. Thank you for everything.

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